So many have felt the loss of this year. When the Covid-19 lockdown started, everyone seemed to be focused on survival until life went back to normal. However, no back to normal was in sight. Many doctors were predicting that this drastic change may last years: we were holding our breath beneath a mask, until the next week, the next month, the next year. My life, however, had already prepared me to live a little outside the norm. Sufferers of chronic disease often experience social isolation, shrinking to the sidelines. Call us wallflowers, call us whatever. I became comfortable hiding, because I was uncomfortable with people seeing my disease. It was the BIG MS, and I wanted to mask it. I was ok with laying low. I had been doing it for years.